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Struggling Sanity

        We all have heard routines are healthy, but they can also become tedious if not balanced properly. I am a stay-at-home mom, and often experience boredom and dissatisfaction toward my daily routine. Feelings of dread and anxiety for the mundane tasks of the day can cast a gray cloud over me quicker than the day began.

        A stagnant lifestyle or lack of direction can flood your mind’s eye with visions of hopelessness. I often feel like I don't contribute any means of support for my family. Even when wearing my super mom cape, I can shut down and become lost behind a fog of self-pity and defeat. This often leaves me feeling useless to my children; that I may be bringing more strife to their adult selves than I am nurturing the delicate beings they are now. In this state one cannot see the future moments waiting and the opportunities that will lead there.

        For me, every day is a struggle to be a kind, wise, nurturing mother, and keep my "BPD" under control. While my girls are just learning what feelings are, I am constantly fighting off an overload, trying to prevent myself from showing weakness or inflicting any emotional hurt to my children. While some days can be better than others, I try to live in the present and be grateful for every second we have together. Whether they’re learning a life lesson, or I am, we get to grow as a family. 

Mindful Minute:

  • How would you rate your parenting? (the scale is up to you)
  • What are the reasons you came to this rating?
  • What are your strengths? Weakness?
  • What do you want to change the most about yourself to help the family?
  • Do you believe an improved family dynamic can be achieved? Why or why not?

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